It's been a long time since I've made an entry in this blog - have been too busy dreaming and posting dreams in my other one to bother with the "real life", so here's my attempt to catch up a bit here.

I've been busy here too, doing this and that, but mostly I've been trying to survive the heat and humidity of summer.  This is not a good time for me - summer never is - so now, at the end of August, I am eagerly awaiting the return of fall.

The Wheel of the Year turns...

Three major additions have been made to my life that I would like to brag about a little:

1.  After more years than most of you have been alive, I have finally began an exercise program.  It took some doing, because the longer I avoided, the harder it was for me to start.  But thanks to a community centre that's just a couple of blocks away, and a wonderful new neighbour who was all excited to start there, I signed up for water aerobic classes. 

Wow!  What a difference this has already made in my life!! I learned to swim when I was a child, and was actually very good at it; but for maybe a half-dozen times in the pool in all these years, there was no contact with water at all.  This course has us doing full blown aerobic exercises non-stop for a full hour (twice a week), so not only am I getting my cardio, I am being kind on my joints!!  So that started me practicing my strokes as well.  It may not sound like much of an accomplishment, but being able to do a width of front crawl and one width on my back is an amazing feat for me in just four sessions.  I can feel myself building the strength and stamina and have no doubt that before long, I'll be doing laps!

So, being encouraged by this small success, I have decided to sign up for a yoga class in September.  I have never done yoga in my life, so this should be an interesting experience indeed!

Yeay for this 67 year old grandma!!!

2.  And speaking of classes, I have also enrolled in a virtual "university" that specializes in spiritual studies.  I have already completed a course on dreams and dream interpretations, and have enrolled in my next one - one that will plumb the depths of my childhood and will help me write an autobiography to leave as a legacy of my life.  Very excited about starting that one.

3.  And finally, yet another forey into conquering fear and self doubt, I have become involved in doing art!  Now mind you, I am no artist by any stretch of imagination, at least not when it comes to drawing and painting, but that's not the point.  The point is for me to enjoy myself; the point is for me to explore what I am from deep inside myself and bring it to a visual reference.  My dreams are far too detailed to just have them as words, so I have begun to render them in drawings.

Let me give you an example of how these connections were all made by a recent inspiration I had and posted elsewhere:

 

Let's call it The Red Tent through Dreams and Art...

One thing leads to another, like a small snowball rolling down the hill. And that's how it was when two factors crossed paths. And something new is born.

Lately, I've been experimenting with dreams and art. Now, I'm no artist by any stretch of the imagination (remember that when you look at the piece - lol), but that's not the important thing. What's important is using colours on a blank sheet of paper to express emotions and instinct that dreams may leave with you upon awakening. It also takes me back to a childhood - and I lose myself in the process. That's factor 1.

Thus it was that I found a group of artists here on Facebook that urge art for art's sake. "Do a mandala", came the directive. Okay. That's factor 2.

So, yesterday (Saturday) afternoon during my nap, I had this dream:

The Ruby Ring

There is a wicker shelving unit in the bathroom, and on it is a small enamil box. I sense it holds some bath salts. I see a glint of red on top of the box and notice a beautiful ring. I reach for it, but it's wedged between the box and the shelf, and it takes me a minute or two to wedge it out. All this time I'm seeing my hands as though through a lense of a camera.

The ring is a circle of rubies in a silver setting. I marvel at seeing it, because I know that I do not possess such a piece. Of course I try it on, and find that it fits perfectly on my index finger of my right hand.

As I drift to wakefulness a thought drifts through my mind that this is a representation of the Red Tent and the connectiveness of all women.

****

I decided to do my mandala on this dream, and while I was working on it, I also got this chant echoing in my mind, which I incorporated into the painting. :

Ring of Power, Ring of Might

Bless the women with your Light.

Ring of Power, ruby red,

Bind us as our flow is shed.

Ring of Power, without end

I reach my hand to you, Sister-Friend!
****

Somewhere in this time I have also done a wedding, and visited some family out of town, battled some not so pleasant health issues, and have decided to start sewing costumes again. 

But all those are stories for another time!  So until then...

THE WEEKEND

This past weekend I enjoyed two different outings that have left very big and happy impressions on me. 


On Saturday, there was a gathering in Brantford.  About a dozen people got together to discuss Dreams, Astral Travel and Shamanic Journeys.  Everyone had wonderful stories and dreams to relate, there were a lot of questions and everyone tried to better understand this complex and mysterious process the mind takes us through on a nightly basis.


It was also an opportunity to indulge in some good nibbles that everyone brought to share.  And we discovered there was a lovely albino corn snake in our midst!  She belongs to our hostess, and we all got a chance to pet her.  


Because I do not drive any more, I invited two friends to join me, one of whom had a vehicle.  It was good to get together, the lively talk made the short journey through the country-side very enjoyable.  It was a lovely sunny day - yes, all was right with the world!


Yesterday, I again got together with Julie (the friend with the car).  She had hoped that there would be more of a gathering of women to do crafts, but it was just me.  Unfortunately, I was not feeling well - the heat and humidity was doing something bad to my head - and after about an hour I had to be taken home again.  While it lasted, it was very pleasant, though, as we sat on the patio, under a large umbrella, she with her beads, and I with my cross-stitching, in a beautiful backyard which had many different gardens, and sipped on ice-cold lemonade.  


It was a very good weekend indeed!

A Chance Meeting

So yesterday, well, yesterday was a day that I will always look back on as one in which my life changed forever.  Of course, every day brings such changes, every day weaves something into the fabric of our beings that makes us different from what we were, but then, there are Days, with a capital D, that become defining moments.  The day delivered peace of mind and heart that I have never felt before.  

Anyways, that was the start.  Circumstances demanded that I get to downtown for some appointments, and after they were over, I slowly wandered around Jackson Square, and of course found myself in Coles book shop.  No big surprise there, since I often browse through books.  I noticed a pretty young lady  and for some reason "really" noticed her.  So, I drifted towards my favourite sections, and ended up at the New Age selection, and before long, she came over as well.  We smiled at each other as we chose one book or another to look at, when suddenly, I hear her say softly, "Lidia?"  

I was startled, because even looking fully at her, I honestly could say that I did not know her.  She reminded me of a time when we both lived at the YWCA some 10 years ago, bringing to mind all that we went through, and I still did not know who she was!  I apologized for this, of course, and we both laughed.  It was enough that she remembered me.  

Before long, we were in a coffee shop, enjoying cups of tea, and talking, talking, talking, and more talking.  We share many interests in common - much more than we had a decade ago, and we both agreed that this was no chance meeting.  

This reunion struck both of us as very significant, and reaffirmed in us both that we live in more than just this physical realm - we connect on so much more!  To me, it opened my spirit up again, because the past couple of weeks, I have begun to feel like giving up.  To her, it meant finding someone with whom she could share all that she cannot with most people.  

The moral of this story is that there are no coincidences, chance meetings are not so random, and that instinct is to be listened to.

Today is the first day of my new life.  I embrace it fully!

Wiccan-Fest 2011

 I did not really want to go to this wonderful festival.  My concerns about my dad lay heavily upon me, and the thought of being inaccessible for five days was bothering me.  Nevertheless, I took that chance and am very glad I did.  

Thanks to my friend, Kelly, for providing the smooth ride there and back.  We discovered early on that night time was not a good time for either of us, because one of us snored - lol!!  Nevertheless, in spite of our wanderings, looking for a place to grab some sleep, it all turned out all right eventually.  

The first clear memory that will be with me always, is of Alex showing up at the opening ritual sky-clad.  Literally sky-clad, since his robe was one that was patterned with blue sky and white clouds.  In addition, while working in the kitchen, he transformed into a red-horned demon whipping up the pancakes, a pirat scrambling the eggs, and a poor victim with a knife in his head cooking up the bacon.  Thank you, Alex, for your never-ending source of joy to us!!

I became brave enough this year to run a couple of workshops, one on The Red Tent and the other on Dreams.  Both went well, but the one on the Red Tent was absolutely electryfying! It led to a lot of personal sharing, tears, beginnings of healing within each of us.  We were joined by three young girls who had not yet experienced their transition to womanhood, and all three also spoke of their fears and aspirations.  Their wisdom was startling - "If we deny that part of ourselves, we diminish ourselves, we become less than what we really are".  I love that!

The workshops I attended were amazing.  "The Oracle of The Living Tarot" brought the Major Arcana to life as we became the archetypes!  Not surprisingly, I drew one of my favourite cards - The Fool - who has much to teach us indeed!  Thank you, Catharine, for bringing this to us!

Loved the workshop on Grimms Fairytales by Kenny Kline.  Earlier on, I bought the book, and spent quite a bit of time reading the stories and analysis, and how these stories have changed throughout the years.  I became immersed in the images of cottages and deep woods, of witches and animals that speak, of fairy folk and human maidens that speak of elemental powers.  

An African Prince and Priest, as Oracle, read my fate.  Now I must plan a feast for my friends.

In the relaxed atmosphere of the dining hall, a couple of new friends, many old friends and I spilled an abundance of words among us, words that encouraged, connected, strengthened and enlightened us all.

I spent a lot of money - more than I should have! - and purchased a beautiful gown of black and gold, a turquoise necklace and bracelet, a book, and a set of starfish pendants.  

And my last night there flung me into my own tale ...

There, at the edge of the woods,  I came across an empty cabin.  Neat it was with five empty beds, inviting me in with promises of peaceful sleep.  About me whispered the last of the words of rest and sleep, and I succumbed.

Magically, a bedroll appeared, along with some food and drink.  Surely this cannot harm me, I thought to myself, ignoring the many warnings not to eat or drink anything that comes from the land of the fey.  And so I did, and before long, felt myself being lulled into the soothing darkness.  About me there was a glow from the near-full Moon, casting all about me into a space where the familiar becomes strange, and that which is strange becomes even more inviting.  

I succumb to all this and after having a bite and drink of the fairy food, I lay down.  I drift, drift towards the darkness of sleep, when all of a sudden, I am startled by a bang on the door!!  Terror seizes my heart!  Who is it?  Who else comes to the door of the empty cottage at the edge of the woods?  The door flings open and outlined against the light of the Moon stands a man!  

Ah, who can this be!?  A handsome prince or an ogre?  The woodsman or the Bear?  

He appears as startled to see me sitting up in bed as I am to see him in the doorway.  "I am but a traveller on this road," he says with apologies, "and I chanced upon this cabin at the edge of the woods.  My apologies, my lady, for I did not mean to startle and frighten you.  May I beg you for this boon, that I may sleep in this far corner?  But not just yet, for I must gather some things from the forest first.  I shall just leave my pack here..."  And with that he disappeared.

Now I remember all the tales of old, and realize that it is not as it all seems.  That by staying in this cabin at the edge of the woods, I may be in mortal peril.  Still partly trapped in the fairy world by the food and drink of magic, I struggle to move away from this enchanted trap.  My bedding disappears as though it never was, and I finally am able to open the door and step outside.  I do not look back, but quickly, as quickly as I can make my way deeper into the woods.

I do not know how I came to see the light of the morning, but when I did, I was happy to see that I was again back in the land of mortals and my night of night of enchantment has passed me by without claiming my soul.  

But I do wonder - just who was that man who knocked and came into the cabin, that empty cabin at the edge of the woods?  Ah, some things must always remain a mystery...

WOMAN IN THE MIRROR

WOMAN IN THE MIRROR

Lidia Tremblay

June 9, 2011

Who is that old woman staring,

Staring back at me from the mirror?

Lined, sagging,

Deep gray shadows

Hiding the eyes?

Who is she, that stranger, staring,

Staring at me,

As though she

Knows me, hears the

Beating of my heart?

From the deep recesses of memory

I see another face

One I dimly recognize

but do not quite see;

Superimposed, 

Same but not the same,

And I wonder, I wonder

When did I become the

Old woman in the mirror?

REMEMBERING BARON TANCRED OF RISING WATERS

He was never still, always running hither and thither and yon.  He made sure that all was going well in the kitchen, creating works of art, the wood sliding through his hands like butter as he shaped it.  He wore the cornet and with the same ease as he would wear a baseball cap.  He gave great hugs - oh yes, I will always remember that about him! - he did indeed give great hugs!

And the last time I saw him was at this last 12th Night, where I greeted him in Russian (it was a Slavic event, after all), and saw, perhaps for the first time, Tancred going silent and mystified.   Sigh - that was a sight to behold indeed, good gentles!

He also was sitting down.  And that mystified and disturbed me.

Upon hearing of his passing, an incredible vision filled my mind - Baroness Fiona, Baroness Elena, King Osis, King Sarnak (sp?) and all the good and great gentles that have passed on before him gathering to greet another son coming into The Great Hall!  I know Valhalla was in envy to see the feasting and rejoicing that occurred at that moment.  Of course, Valhalla had a place for him too - they just had to wait their turn in honouring this warrior!!

I will miss you deeply, Your Excellency! I will miss you deeply, but I will never, ever forget you!

MUSINGS ON EARTH DAY AND GOOD FRIDAY

WARNING:  CONTAINS STRONG FEELINGS AND OPINIONS

This will not be a popular Blog for people to read.  It's something that has been bothering me for a long time, and is finally coming to a head.  Today, Earth Day and Good Friday rolled into one, it's tearing me apart with all sorts of conflicting emotions that I must express.  So here it it:

Men, you screwed it up royally!  You have had control over the Earth's dealings, comings and goings for millennia, and all that you're doing is messing things up more and more on a daily basis.  

Let's go back to the beginning for a moment - in the beginning, when humanity was gaining foothold on this world, there was only Goddess.  Only The Mother!  All historical and archaeological evidence points to that fact.  The balance was contained in the Sacred Feminine because She held the male and female within Herself.  It was simple, natural and good.  Women learned and then taught others about agriculture, weaving, and the built societies.  Their Moon Blood was considered sacred, for it was the tangible connection to The Mother from whom all came.

And then, some man realized that there had to be a God - and with that notion came wars, conflicts, subjugation of women, and power over.  Men had to claim their "rightful place" in this world.  If women bled in peace, then men would bleed in conflict and through sacrifice.  And women were deemed evil.  The male sky gods were given the power to create and birth only as a woman and the Goddess can, this claiming supremacy over all.  The Goddesses themselves began to suffer, declare their place under the rules of the Gods.  No wonder women bought into this lie!  

So even in today's world it's still a man's world, because somehow women bought into the fact that they are somehow less important then men.  Earth Day, celebrated today, is supposed to be truly Mother's Day - The Mother who is continually plundered, raped, and made subject to man's will.  Man-made disasters and natural ones, which in most cases can be traced to disrespect and misuse of the resources we were given, are all around us.  Most CEO's of the big corporations that are responsible for this are men.  The religious organizations are run by men.  Most countries are run by men.  Most domestic abuse is inflicted by men upon women.  

So again I say, men, you screwed it up!!  

On this Good Friday, when one Man tried to make it better, all His teachings have been misconstrued and made into Manpower over the destinies and lives of others.  You've screwed it up again.

Maybe it's time for us women to take over.  Maybe it's time to bring back The Mother, the Supreme Creatrix and have Her teach us what we have forgotten.  No, not maybe.  For me it's the definite.  The balance is in Her hands only.  

Persephone  will NOT be raped any longer!

Hera will NOT be suffering the infidelities of Her consort!

Innana will NOT be left to moulder in the Underworld forever!

And The Mother WILL be honoured and listened to!